[Clip starts]
WATTERS: “He’s fun, he’s not a fascist. Was Hitler making self-deprecating jokes? No.”
(…)
Trump: “They accuse me of being a Hitler-type guy, or a Hitler lover, and I’m not. I’m the opposite.”
[Clip ends]
(Laughter)
CHARLAMAGNE THA GOD: “Opposite of Hitler? I don’t know what that means unless it’s his weird way of telling us he’s circumcised. So, listen, both sides had their campaign rhetoric, Trump came out on top, and in a few years we are going to find out who is right and who is wrong. I’m a person who’s called him a fascist, I want to be wrong. And maybe we all will be, because don’t forget, one thing Trump loves more than anything is being unpredictable. He loves it more than he loves his children. Okay, bad example. He loves it more than KFC. And now he has a chance to do something truly unexpected. Don’t be a fascist! And maybe you think that’s not possible, but you know me, I’m an optimist. I think if I could just talk to Donald Trump directly, I could convince him. So let me try. Mr. Trump, sir. Mr. Trump, sir, you are a manly man with great hair and the tightest neck pu**y I’ve ever seen. Yeah, he is listening now. I need to talk to about your plans. Right now you can do anything you want. You have both houses of Congress, and thanks to the Supreme Court, you can feed Nancy Pelosi to alligators and call it an official act. But that’s what all your enemies say you are going to do, and just think about how stupid they will look if you don’t. You know what liberals hate even more than being thrown into a CIA black site? Being wrong! You could own the libs so hard just by not being a fascist! Not being a fascist is so easy. Look, I’m doing it right now!
(Cheering and Applause)
By the way, I’m still doing it. It’s simple! Okay? You don’t even have to do good things for America, just do nothing. Go golfing. That’s right! You love golfing and you are so good at it, too. We all know he cheats. You know what, Mr. President? We will even let you have a little personal corruption as a reward. Just leave the Constitution in one piece and we will let you skim a billion or two out of the Medicare budget. It’s fine. You could literally sit on your ass doing nothing for four years straight and you’ll be considered the greatest president of all time just because you didn’t destroy democracy like they said you would! [Bleep] . And listen, Mr. President, if you just destroy the economy, lead us into a recession, I can live with that. That’s normal Republican president stuff. Just keep your big, strong, not-tiny hands out of the fascist cookie jar. And maybe, maybe I still think you’re going to do it anyway, to quote the great philosopher Sabrina Carpenter, ‘Please, please, please, don’t prove I’m right.’ But that’s just my opinion.”
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